How to Get Attention Without Attention-seeking

It can be painfully scary to ask a partner if they still love us. So at points when we feel insecure, we may be tempted to go in for a very understandable but very counter--productive strategy: attention-seeking, that is irritating or nagging them to notice us, rather than making ourselves sufficiently vulnerable to ask them for the reassurance we crave.

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FURTHER READING

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“One of the most obvious but in practice very hardest things to ask a partner, even one we name in our will and whose life is entirely entwined with ours, is: ‘Do you still love me?’ There would be so many reasons why they might not do so any more: we might have driven them to the limit with our admittedly at points really rather challenging behaviour. We’re not getting any younger. There are a lot of other people – especially at work and in the invisible parts of their life – who would have great things to offer them. It’s hard to trust anyone, given what can happen. Furthermore, the signs aren’t necessarily very good at the moment. They spend a lot of time on their phones. They’re a bit distracted. Their thoughts seem elsewhere.”

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CREDITS

Produced in collaboration with:

Gemma Green-Hope
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Title animation produced in collaboration with

Vale Productions
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