How to deal with abandonment and disconnection from others?

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Q: In general I feel that if we can talk about spiritual relationship that
means nothing but trying to understand the truth behind anything that is happening. And that means is trying to connect with each other even in the darkest periods and moments of struggle between each other whatever is happening. For me I think this is important. How do you understand spiritual relationship?

M: What is the difference between spiritual the normal relationships?
I don't like the term "spiritual relationship". Maybe more aware relationship. Is the fact that you deal in a different way the experience of abandonment. I feel this is the key difference because one way one way or another all of us in any kind of relationship we are we abandon each other. At some point or another we do this. It's a given of this life. You have a partner you think he has to be there when you need it the most and he's not there for you, he abandoned you or she abandoned you. How do you handle that? How do you internalize that? How do you digest that experience of abandonment? This is crucial: the way you handle abandonment. This makes the difference. If you respond to the experience of abandonment with your own abandonment that means that's not spiritual relationship. It's just ordinary normal relationship. This is the ordinary way of how things happen. Someone let you down - you let him down. To go on a different level to answer abandonment with... I don't know what... Because you cannot fake it and to just say: "You know what? I'm beyond this!" No. You really really need to go there and go deep and see what what exactly is triggering you, and see what's happening, why it is so painful? Because it's not about what it looks like is happening. It is never about that. And to see the games of the mind, how the mind starts to whisper to you: "He doesn't care about you. Just go away from here and do something else". Or: "Yeah, he doesn't look at you. Just act mad and don't talk with anyone for three days!" It's like this. This is like devil whispering in our head. And with enough attention you can always hear this voice.

Q: But what if you hear it, but it doesn't change your reaction?

M: Doesn't matter. Hearing it it's already enough. For the time being it's enough.

Q: But I don't think it is enough for a partner.

M: It might not be. But in the course of time, if there is this hearing that you are talking about - this will make the difference. If there is no this hearing and you just go with the voice as soon as it appears, it tells you to also disconnect, because your partner is disconnected -this voice will become stronger and stronger. And in the course of time it will create only separation. This is how it works. If you
listen to the voice that separates - it will separate you. And we all know this voice. It is like you go to a party and you feel totally not fitting in there. You feel like everyone looks strange at you, it is like you don't speak their language or something. And the mind generate these thoughts: "Oh, they are laughing at you!" And the more you listen to it - the more you will see this this science of separation outside you. And you entertain them. And the more you entertain them the more they are becoming real. And this is how the separate reality of the ego is created, how one goes through all these, through all this. You just have to accept whatever these crazy thoughts are telling you: "Oh. They are laughing at you!". Okay. So they have laughing at me. So what? What is so painful about it?Okay. When you are looking at it - it is painful. I wish I could be with them. I wish I will share this laughter together. But I cannot. Okay. So what? It's so powerful this. It melts any kind of heart, any kind of madness which supposedly it is on the other side.