How to Deal with Separation Anxiety | 7 Tips

Separation anxiety in children is a natural and developmentally appropriate phase. According to John Bowlby’s attachment theory, it supports survival — infants seek closeness to their primary caregiver and may cry, call, or follow when separated.

In this video, I share 7 gentle, practical tips to help children navigate separation with more ease.

1. Practise separation
Briefly step out of the room and tell your child you’ll return. This helps them experience separation in a safe, manageable way. Choose moments when your child is well-rested and content (not hungry or tired).

2. Create rituals
Keep goodbyes short and consistent. Small rituals — a phrase, song, or routine — help children feel secure and know what to expect.

3. Plan transitions carefully
Keep surroundings familiar where possible. Avoid introducing multiple big changes at once (for example, starting nursery while moving house or returning to work).

4. Talk with your child
Explain where you’re going and what will happen. Even very young children benefit from being spoken to with respect and clarity. Let them know separation anxiety is normal and that you will return.

5. Regulate your own state
Children sense our emotions. If you feel very anxious, seek support from another adult during transitions. Calm presence helps children feel safe.

6. Give them something to look forward to
Offer a simple “task” or plan for while you’re away. This provides focus and reassurance during separation.

7. Acknowledge effort
Notice and praise your child’s attempts to cope — even small steps matter.

Important: never sneak away. Leaving without saying goodbye can damage trust and increase anxiety.

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Watch next: bit.ly/CoSleepingGoodorBad
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I’m Didi Aurelia — Montessori educator, founder of a Montessori nursery in London, and I hold a Master’s in Psychology.
I support parents in bringing Montessori principles into everyday home life in a practical, calm, and respectful way.

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Website → didiaurelia.com
Subscribe here → youtube.com/@didiaurelia
E-mail: [email protected]