How to Flirt Online

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Whether you're one of the 40 million people looking for love on a dating website or just chatting with a cute someone, make your messages must-reads!

Step 1: Be positive
Be positive. The fastest way to end flirty banter is to be Debbie Downer.

Step 2: Be confident
Sound confident--even if you're not. People are attracted to self-assurance.

Step 3: Be funny
Use humor. If witty repartee isn't your strong suit, repeat something someone else said that you found funny, or share something amusing you read in the paper.

Step 4: Be brief
Keep messages brief--you want to retain an aura of mystery.

Tip
Ask lots of general questions like, "If you could go anywhere, where would you go?"--people love to talk about themselves.

Step 5: Avoid baring your soul
Avoid intense, soul-baring discussions that might scare people off.

Step 6: Be observant
Be observant about the details in their profile, and ask follow-up questions to things they mention in messages to you. It shows you're sincerely interested--and not self-obsessed.

Step 7: Give compliments
Dole out the compliments. Who doesn't want to hear nice things? If you saw them on a dating site, mention their impressive resume. If you met in person, gush about something they said or did. But be sincere.

Tip
Use spell-check and re-read your message before pressing "send"--stupidity is a real turnoff!

Step 8: Don't get discouraged
Don't get discouraged. You're not going to be compatible with everyone. Cut your losses and move on to the next hottie.

Did You Know?
Couples who meet on the dating site Match.com tend to date for a shorter period before getting married than couples who meet in more traditional ways.